J Amoah Speaks

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Now I know some of you may be wondering okay, great topic but how does it apply to me if I’m single and not in a relationship? How does this relate to my life? Well think about it, we all have many different relationships with different people. We have relationships with our parents, siblings, boyfriend/ girlfriend, friends, or children. Some of us are great when it comes to relationships with our boyfriends/girlfriends but give no time for our closest friends. It’s important for us to know how to balance our relationships with the various people in our lives.  In this post I’ll be sharing some helpful tips to having a healthy relationship.

Respect Each Other:

Respect is vital in any relationship. That means, respecting someone’s time, energy, and opinions. In order to have a healthy relationship you should always show respect, don’t take advantage of someone’s kindness or generosity. Even if you have known the person for years, do not get comfortable and feel as though you don’t have to respect this person. We must always remember that just as we want to be respected and understood we should learn to be respectful and understanding. We must also learn to appreciate those in our lives, while they are still here.

 

Give the person space:   

Learn to give people their space. No one wants to feel like they can’t breathe.  And I get it, maybe you have finally falling in love with the love of your life and just want to be around them all the time and know every second of their day. But we must also give that person time to do their own thing and be their own person. That includes best friends too, allow your best friend to have other friends that they can also hang out with. Maybe you’re a parent and want to always have your kids around you, allow them space to hang out with kids within their age group. Having a healthy relationship involves giving the person enough space that they can be their own person and not feel smothered.

 

Be supportive:

Learn to support those around you. We all need encouragement and it’s important that you support and motivate the people in your life. Don’t knock them down, learn to support their ideas and be their biggest cheerleaders. You may not agree with what they are doing, but learn to voice your opinion in a positive and constructive way, while still lifting them up.

 

Be honest:

Wife: “Tell me the truth, do you like this dress honey?”

Husband: “It’s beautiful”

Wife: “your lying… tell me the truth and be honest!”

Husband: “okay… it’s actually not flattering on you, and the color is horrible.”

Wife: “Wow… thanks for making me feel ugly, that’s why I don’t like asking you anything!”

 

Sounds familiar? Why is it that when we ask people to be honest with us we then get upset with their response? In order to have a healthy relationship we must be willing to hear the truth even when it hurts. Having a genuine and healthy relationship with someone means being able to tell the person the truth without them feeling offended. Learn to always keep it real with those closest to you and be able to take the realness in your relationships.

 

Stop being negative:

No one wants to have a relationship or be around someone who is constantly being negative. Change the way you think! Stop wishing or hoping for the worst for your friends.  Learn to be that positive light in your relationship, even if the other person is not.

 

 Forgive easily:

This is the KEY!! Holding on to unforgiveness can ruin any relationship. I know learning to forgive is definitely hard especially when someone close to you has hurt you, but in order to have any healthy relationship we should learn to forgive easily.  Remember none of us are perfect we all make mistakes and need plenty of forgiveness (thank God for His Grace and Mercy). Stop holding on to grudges and doing tit for tat. Let’s pray that God will help us to forgive daily.

 

Be spontaneous:

Spice it up!! Learn to be spontaneous and do things just because!  Maybe you have a friend who you haven’t seen in a while and they have been dying to see you, surprise them with a quick visit if you can or random lunch date. Or maybe you have been married for years and haven’t done anything fun in a while, spice it up with a little weekend getaway just for two! Learn to enjoy your life and live in the moment with your loved ones.

Listen:

Listening in any relationship is super important for so many reasons. No one wants to feel like their voice or opinions are not being heard. We should remember to talk less, listen more (Lord knows I’m definitely guilty of this).  Sometimes we want our voices to be heard so much that we don’t even take a second to listen to what the other person is saying, especially if they are telling you they don’t like something and you continue to do it. Let’s learn to stop being so selfish and really listen to one another.

 

Love them for who they are:

Everyone wants to feel comfortable knowing they can be themselves without feeling judged by the people around  them. In order to have a healthy relationship with anyone, learn to accept and embrace them for who they are. That is not to say that you won’t advise them when they are doing something wrong, but you will love them as Christ loves us. Sometimes as a society we are so quick to point out others flaws that we don’t realize we have a ton of flaws as well. Even if your child is misbehaving, correct them but continue to shower them with love. Don’t complain and compare them to someone else’s  child. The same goes for your wife, brother, mother, best friend, whoever. Don’t compare them to someone else, learn to love and embrace them for who they are.

 

Let’s make a decision to be better sisters, brothers, wives, husbands, daughters, sons, and friends to those around us. Let’s make a conscious effort to create healthier relationships and spend quality time with those special people in our lives.

I know trying to have healthy relationships with the people in your life can be difficult and a bit of a challenge but remember, we can do all things through Christ.

Stay Blessed.

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